28 May 2018

Summer Jam 2018 Week Three! Friends Peas Parties

As we round Memorial Day weekend there are a handful of songs that are still hot, but shuffling around. Or I at least only like three or four pop songs right now. They'll get pop accolades as long as I'm running this show, baby! Most of the rest of this list is just talking about songs I wanted to talk about. Crank those speakers up, baby!

Hot Jam of the Week: "Ring the Alarm" by The Black Eyed Peas



So, this song is clearly terrible and comes off more as a desperate attempt to capitalize on Kendrick Lamar or Childish Gambino-level racial awareness than anything else. The Black Eyed Peas aren't a politically conscious band - they're a party band. This is like the most ingenuous song ever. Also they couldn't even get Fergie. This band is all about Fergie, literally the only point to listening to them. As you can tell, I really really hate the Black Eyed Peas. Except for "Imma Be," weirdly enough. Anyway, they won the Summer Jam back in 2009, but you will never hear this song again.

"Welcome to the Party" by Diplo, French Montana, & Lil' Pump

Can you picture a bigger piece of shit collabo? In honor of Deadpool 2 (2018) we include this track, although we probably should have thrown in Celine Dion. That's a remarkably good soundtrack, for that song and this, which totally sound like songs that weren't created solely for this movie. Of course, dubstep is for pussies, but this is a fun track that could actually earn some Summer Jam Thumping creds if it catches on mainstream. Tho some of it feels kind of 2014, right?

"Rosanna" by Weezer

Weezer hasn't been on this list...maybe ever, but it's great to hear some new music from them, especially one that rocks as hard as this. It also has a classic tune to it and while I'd be pretty surprised if it catches on and gains momentum this summer, it's fun this week.

"Meant to Be" by Bebe Rexha ft. Florida Georgia Line

"Meant to Be" returns again and just...won't...die. This track was everywhere again this week and really hasn't peaked listenability for me, and apparently the country, either. Good for Bebe who is also pretty likable and deserves to have a track like this to distinguish herself from the thousands of other blonde starlets crooning for their supper these days.

"Friends" by Marshmello & Anne Marie

I really like this Marshmello character. Reminds me of the weird dancing robot from those old LMFAO videos. Anne Marie is clearly trying a little too hard and into some hardcore mugging for the camera, but I suppose that's what you have to do to stand out these days. This track is actually pretty old and took a while to grow on me, but it's starting to take off. It could contend in June.

"This is America" by Childish Gambino

His Lando is the best part of the #1 movie in the country and this track is still killing it, as the #1 song on the Billboard Hot 100. It hasn't gotten much radio play, and it's kind of an awkward song to jam out to, but it's still the topic of much discussion and a surprising amount of memes who don't really understand what this track is about at all.

"No Tears Left to Cry" by Ariana Grande

I get these next too songs mixed up, both N - negative tracks. Anyway, I'm still in the middle of considering if this is a mournful sorrowful jam or an upbeat resilient jam. It's somewhere in the middle, and the way Ariana bounces between ballad and snippy is great. And she snagged Pete Davidson this week! Pete is definitely DEFINITELY batting up.

"Never Be The Same" by Camila Cabello

The clear winner this week, this jam was everywhere, and has now moved up each week this summer. Can Camilla win the Summer like she basically won the Fall and Winter? It's certainly possible, although generally tracks that peak in May don't have much legs. If this extends into June with some high numbers it's certainly possible. It's conceivably one of the lyrically shallower jams this week, but that's fine. Camila can work her pipes enough to make up for it.

Next week...

Camila's former gang, Fifth Harmony dropped a new jam this week, but it's shit. There was also new jams from Christina and Demi, and a J.Lo / DJ Khalid / Cardi B track that's also all shit. I was tempted to include Cardi B's "Be Careful," which finally got a music video this week, but it's not totally that hot anymore, tho still my favourite Cardi jam. And Drake. Drake's still around. All these folks may jump into the Winners List one of these weeks. Stay tuned, True Believers!

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