War of the Months: August

Well folks, it's the final day in August (well, the last 15 minutes), which means it's time once again for War of the Months, your year-long look at the cinematic box office and critical trends and results for every month of the year. This is another dumping month, which by the way, why are there so many more dump months than good months? Is there really just that much crap around? August is for July hangovers. Generally there's nothing going on, school is about to start, people are on vacation, it's a time for everyone to do nothing with their Sunshine while they actually don't have obligations for a few weeks. There's a bit of greatness in that though, but it certainly shows at the movies.

August: Month of Bleh

Nothing's really going on in August. It's this Dead Zone for everyone's lives. In terms of movies, there are generally some potentially big flicks that come out and some do pretty well. It IS still Summer, after all. Early August tends to be a great time for Sleeper Comedy hits to launch as well as some Blockbusters whose Financial Predictions may fall in between March and June. Flicks just risky enough that studios would avoid an important weekend, but may still do pretty decent.

August Moola: Fitting the Bill

After July, August certainly seems lacking. The Bourne Ultimatum (2007), August's greatest movie ever, opened at $69,283,690, which isn't too shabby, but certainly not the worst possible. Although this is far below the biggest March and April Opening Weekends, the Top 10 August Weekends Ever show us that there are still a lot more films that can nab $40 - 50 million than any of the Spring Months.

Relevant.

Some of the other Top 10 August Films include Rush Hour 2 (2001), Signs (2002), American Pie 2 (2001) and Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006). As you can see, it tends to be a place for films that are franchises or brands but not really that great, and surprisingly good comedies. Clearly the success of our two August Risers, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) and Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011) are a testament to that.

The Top August Ever was 2007. In addition to the success of The Bourne Ultimatum somehow confirming that the Bourne Series was a legitimate cultural force, even though hardly anyone seemed to see the first one, it also saw Rush Hour 3 close out the Summer of Threequels. Finally it was really helped by Superbad's slow burn that continued to generate revenue for some time after it released. The rest of the August Releases this year are atrocious. You've got things like Daddy Day Camp, The Invasion, WAR and Balls of Fury. None of these did business, but the sheer number of them added something to the Box Office Totals.

August Quality: Fucking Terrible

This can be a rough month. There really aren't a whole lot of pagestoppers here but there are some gems amidst the endless swirling sea of shit. A lot of these are small comedies that turned out to be awesome, or an underrated action flick, as well as the occasional Oscar-worthy pic somehow.

#10: Superbad - 08/17/2007
#9: Scott Pilgrim vs. the World - 08/13/2010
#8: Desperado - 08/25/1995
#7: District 9 - 8/14/2009
#6: The Fugitive - 08/06/1993
#5: Tropic Thunder - 08/13/2008
#4: Unforgiven - 08/07/1992
#3: The Iron Giant - 08/06/1999
#2: The Usual Suspects - 08/16/1995
#1: Inglourious Basterds - 08/21/2009

Use your coin!

I gave Basterds the edge because there is no reason ever to watch The Usual Suspects more than once, tho that first time is great. Good Augusts tend to come in spurts. This includes 2009, 1995, which also includes Babe, and 1999, which in addition to The Iron Giant adds under-appreciated Comedies Mystery Men and Bowfinger. It also tends to be a super-Apatow month featuring The 40-Year Old Virgin (2005), Talladega Nights, The Other Guys (2010) and Pineapple Express (2008). In addition it has tons of cult Comedies like Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back (2001), Rat Race (2001), Beerfest (2006) and Mystery Team (2009).

In terms of the few solid action flicks August produces that just missed the cut here are Natural Born Killers (1994), Blade (1998), xXx (2002) and Layer Cake (2004). Besides these bleak offerings August also gave us the Greatest Feel-Good Movie of all time, The Replacements (2000).

So that's August. A fun month for sure, there's definitely an enjoyable flick every once in a while, but more often than not this is just a terrible month to go to the movies. 2011 was especially horrible, besides the somehow okay Ascent of the World of the Monkeys. Of course if you think this is unbearable at all you all but need to wait until September rears its atrocious head.

Summer Jam 2011: August 29 Winners

There were five Mondays in August, that's terrible. Welcome again folks to the Winner's List for the week preceding August 29th, 2011, our Summer-Long tracking of the hottest Summer Jams to crank out of those speakers. There's a lot of wackiness in this, our penultimate week of Sunshiny Times, so blast the Boom Box one last time and let's begin:

#8: "Stereo Hearts" by Gym Class Heroes ft. Adam Levine

How is Adam Levine suddenly everywhere? I'm expecting a Wuss Rock-off between him and Chris Martin sometime soon. I also think Travie is garbage, but this is still a rad song mostly from the groovy beat, although that tends to lose its funk during the choruses. The third stanza breakdown by Adam is also so pop cliché it's almost distracting. Obviously at this point no one's considering this a fearsome Summer Jam threat, but it might have a few nice weeks as we wrap things up here.

#7: "Pumped up Kicks" by Foster the People

It's always nice to see an actual band on this list every once in a while. It's weird what alt songs can crossover into the Pop Mainstream and this is doing a nice job of that so far. I was listening to these dudes back in February and thought it was one of the funkiest tracks about school shootings since "Jeremy." It's got enough of a light-spirited tone and pulsating rhythm to slip into the mainstream, but it's also a pretty crazy track lyrically. It's Pop development will be interesting.

#6: "Party Rock Anthem" by LMFAO ft. Lauren Bennett & GoonRock

Huge fall this week but is the damage already done? Billboard already named it the #1 Song of Summer and its pedigree is excellent. I think it's a very zeitgeist-y song, infused with hipster irony, a techno-driven beat and some very goofy looking dudes. It's very simplistic, which is what Pop is all about. This really is the track to beat come Labour Day when we tally the Final Winners.

#5: "Super Bass" by Nicki Minaj

Back up after dropping off a bit, Nicki is unstoppable. This is a tough song to hate and get sick of, which is a credit to the charisma and ridiculous flow of Nicki herself. I never thought the instrumentals were impressive at all here, but they're actually understated enough to put the attention on Nicki's vocals, which are the real highlight, anyway. I think this could end up being ranked pretty highly at Summer's End, she hasn't really been out for very long all Summer.

#4: "I Wanna Go" by Britney Spears

It's interesting that Britney had a good hit at the start of Summer with "Till the World Ends" and is coming around again here at the end. If the timing of either track was a bit better I might be considering her for Summer Jam Queen a bit more seriously, but as of now she's not doing anything special. This track certainly isn't exceptional or very outstandingly Summer-y so there isn't a whole lot to talk about here.

#3: "Moves Like Jagger" by Maroon 5 ft. Christina Aguilera

Christina and Britney rocking the Pop Charts? What is this, 1999? This track is set to explode though, which makes sense because it's so filled with jazzy pop sensibilities. I don't understand anyone paying attention to a track like this that really seems like an homage to Mick when he's got his own Superband around the corner putting out great Jams of his own. The sheer weirdness of genre mashing that Superheavy accomplishes is way more interesting than a crappy collaboration by the Stars of The Voice on NBC.

#2: "Lighters" by Bad Meets Evil ft. Bruno Mars

I think this track is already starting to peak out on the irritation level, which is good because there aren't a whole lot of Summer Weeks left. It's fun to hear 5'9" take it to Em on this track, he kills it far better than Em does. I also praise this as one of the only Summer Jams to have an instrumental worth listening to. There's a lot of layers and building here, far beyond the repetitious crap of some other songs this Summer (see below).

#1: "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)" by Katy Perry

With four weeks at #1 this has actually tied "Rolling in the Deep" and "Party Rock Anthem" with the most this Summer. Even though there's no reason why it shouldn't also win next week its spotty history for the rest of the Sun Months may work against it. Needless to say, Katy as an artist has dominated the Season again, though with her success split this time between this track and "E.T." I'm not sure either track will be considered worthy of Queenship. We'll find out next week!

We thankfully lost Pitbull this week, he actually had a big slide out of the Billboard Top 10 but could be back next week pretty easily. We also said goodbye to GaGa, we'll see if that long streak around the Middle of the List will do her any good when it's time to add everything up.

So next week in addition to rallying the final Winners and determining who had the Greatest Summer Jam of 2011 we should also see some more up and coming songs that may be big Fall Hits, although for sure aren't doing anything else this Summer. I'm looking at Dev's "Dancing in the Dark," the aforementioned Superheavy as well as tons of hot upcoming albums from Coldplay, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Lil Wayne among others. It's crazy.

Cultural Microcosm: The Strange Exhibition of Jersey Shore

Another Season of Jersey Shore is upon us, folks. Whether you love this show because you identify with the characters, love to mock them or just want to fit in, Shore is here to stay. You may also despise this program for hundreds of plausible reasons. It's an exercise in low entertainment. Still, especially when watching this season take place in Florence, Italy, I found the distinctive culture of the show growing in intrigue. Let's for a moment, examine what makes Jersey tic:

Introducing Pauly D - the only reason to come back next week.

There are plenty of Microcultures in this country. That is, relatively small pockets or groups of people that share a similar outlook on life or general habits and ways of doing things. Miami, Florida culture is going to be very different than Cleveland, Ohio culture. Probably better for basketball playing. Likewise there's distinct Hipster Culture, Tween Culture, even Rugged Lumberjack Culture. It's not often that these people clash with each other, but when they do there may be tension, simply because someone immersed in Twilight Culture may treat people differently than someone immersed in Golden Girls Culture. It's not like one is wrong or better than another, it's just different.

Then there's Jersey Culture. I don't know why MTV picked this pocket of East Coast Trash to create a reality show around, but whatever the reason it clicked and it's now Cable's Highest Rated show. What the hell? There are a handful of these shows like, the Real Housewives of New Jersey or whatever, but Jersey Shore is the big focal point here, providing a model of acting for an entire generation of Television Watchers. Yes, that should scare the shit out of you. The stars of Jersey Shore, whether they realise it or not, are advertising Jersey Culture, even though it's actually an even smaller pocket, they're self-proclaimed Guido Culture - basically twenty-something Italian-Americans (or the brownest equivalent) living in the vicinity of the NYC Metro area. So what do these people appreciate?

Jersey Culture is loud, abrasive and proud. Quick to anger, insult and blow things out of proportion. Fake boobs, fake tans and obsessive behaviour over physical appearances in both males and females typify the experience. What's more interesting than the actual culture though is how for granted its practitioners take it. Watching this show is almost difficult to follow because of how automatic the characters reactions are to seemingly insignificant events. Last week Snooki found out that The Situation has been lying about smushing her two months ago - this automatically means that if her BF Gianni finds out they will break up. This shouldn't make sense to any logical human. Shouldn't Snooki be able to easily say that the Sitch is fabricating the story and shouldn't Gianni trust her enough to believe her? No, because lying, cheating and alcohol are so infused with the Culture that also contains so much judgment, anger and rash decisions that any peaceful solution is aberrant to their lifestyle. Now you're starting to see why MTV chose this group of people.

What's more interesting is how this nearly impenetrable Culture is guarded by its practitioners, at times very aggressively. After being a practitioner of Lumberjack Culture myself, I laugh every time the guys have commented on Vinny's "beard" this season. There is a goal to maintain constant equilibrium. Weekly haircuts and tanning sessions, constant gym access to keep up a perceived perfect appearance. For all its excess and alcohol it is not a risky culture, or one that incorporates difference well at all. It appears very tight-knit and secluded.

It's great that the show has taken seasons outside of the Geographic Jersey Shore in order to fully demonstrate this idea. You'll note that they aren't sightseeing in Florence - they GTL. They have no interest in appreciating other cultures. When in Miami they sought out and engorged themselves on the Clubs and Hotspots that were most like their Jersey hometown. Even in Florence they always have this urge to replicate their own culture rather than accept a new one, even for a short period of time. In Miami Sammi was more obsessed with Ronnie than enjoying the sunshine and location they were visiting. There is no desire to do anything not included in their Jersey-based culture: Physical fitness, copious alcohol consumption, finding as many members of the opposite sex to copulate with and meticulous personal care that makes metrosexuals look like hungry hobos.

Now, this may have something to do with the editing of the show, which no reality show is really factual. It does stand out amidst Reality Programming though in the fact that the same people have returned for Four Seasons now (besides the swap of Deena for Angelina) with no competition involved or goal to achieve. In the end, it really comes off more of a study, like examining how animals behave in a zoo. It's fascinating. It's a peak into a Culture that is so insane, so deviant from the mainstream and yet within the Jersey Culture every action is so automated and performed with such huge confidence that it comes off as more inclusive than it really is. Instead of allowing for any other cultural factors to enter in they relish their own attitudes and personal philosophies, and yet find innumerous ways to disagree and argue with each other despite the Culture's limited sets of available attitudes and personalities to choose from. There is no desire to absorb any other culture because theirs is so egotistical and dominant in their own eyes - they keep attempting to replicate Jersey everywhere instead of soaking in something new.

Jersey Shore comes on MTV 58 minutes from now. Go watch the Exhibition.