25 July 2016

Summer Jam 2016 Week 11: All New Hotness Edition

Amazingly, we're ten weeks deep into summer and baby, we're just starting to heat up! Well, that is, we're sustaining a crazy hot drought streak. Pour draughts not droughts! But for real folks, it's time to get real spicey with it and drop a ton of new jams that ought to become throne-worthy in the latter half of the Season of Sunshine. Maybe.

Hot Jam of the Week: "Purple Lamborghini" by Skrillex & Rick Ross



There are a few songs being dropped for Suicide Squad (2016), but all of them blow except for this. I dig the brief audio and teaser we've gotten which totally absorbs the Suicide Squad look, which is also so frank and violently distinct from anything else DC has done (or really any superhero film for that matter). It's amazing that Warner Bros pushed this out before Wonder Woman (2017), but who are we to complain? We ought to keep on the song - it sounds exactly like every other Rick Ross song ever, but that's not such a bad thing. It's great just to hear movie-inspired tracks get traction again.

Gorilla Bash: "Take It From Me" by KONGOS

I constantly ponder whether or not KONGOS are a good band. They're definitely listenable. Maybe that's enough. This is a little old, but as is the case with many slow-rollout rock jams, it's only gained a lot of popular notoriety in the last week or so. It's a cool song, if not a little indistinguishable. There's a lot of weird folk in the thumping rock and deep-altered voices here. I don't see it taking off, but it's cool for now.

The II's Have It: "Tiimmy Turner" by Desiigner

Iis thiis Desiigner's thiing now? Also this refers to this Timmy Turner, right? That's terrible. I love that current Google Image search for "Timmy Turner" returns a ton of cartoons and rappers. And should this be pronounced "Timmy" or "Timey"? Wouldn't the i's together be long instead of short? This is all so damn white, but the highly anticipated follow-up to "Panda" certainly disappoints. I do like how Desiigner apparently is a fan of indiscriminate background yelling and growling in his beats along with really weird title choices.

Back with the Biebs: "Cold Water" by Major Lazer ft Justin Biever and MO

I don't know what MO is. But this is a nice assault by Major Lazer who for some reason has taken this long to pair with the baby brat. I do like any song that acknowledges that there's nothing wrong with getting high, and while this is no "Lean On" or hell, even a "Love Yourself", it'll do the job in putting some young girls in the mood. Hrmm. I'll just leave that there while I'm behind.

Back with Adele: "Send My Love (To Your New Lover)" by Adele

I heard this earlier today. So there. That's what it takes to get on this extremely exclusive and erudite list. I did want to talk about how trippy and magical this video is again, though, and it's actually a better song the more you listen to it. It's still far away from the ubiquity of "Hello" but it's not really a worse track. It's actually lyrically dripping in irony, angst, and cheekiness in equal measure. Did you know that Adele and Taylor Swift are the same age? Don't piss them off, boys.

Tick-Tock: "Lost Boy" by Ruth B

This song has been on the periphery for a while, dipping in and out this summer, but for some reason I really clued into it this week. It's all about fucking Rufio, as is my understanding, which is weird, because Rufio always bangs on the floor-io. That's right. This is a great, contemplative song that fills you with all the sads. It's spectacular. Summer!

Back with the Other Justin: "Can't Stop the Feeling" by JT

It was looking for a while there like "Can't Stop the Feeling", which is so notable because I have to look up the song title every damn time, was going to be THE Summer Jam Champion, but it's been upset this week. It's still got a very good chance at pulling it off, although I did straight-up ignore it the first few weeks of Summer. Still, it's put in its work these past couple weeks. But JT settles for a Bono this week - #2 forever!


That's right! Sia gets the number one spot this week and I'm pumped. This jam is crawling up there and ready to decimate all those who lay before it! In a sea of cookie cutter jams this is one that really stands out. Its YouTube views slaughter "Can't Stop the Feeling" and it disguises this false club-thumping ideology behind a sultry sassy vocal performance by the vastly underrated woman without a face. I'm down all day.

Next week...

I might add Katy Perry's horrible Rio song one of these weeks for the Olympics. Maybe. It's just so awful. I couldn't get through it. Other than that, the usual rabble of Ariana, Daya, Calvin Harris, and Fifth Harmony are always hanging around. I heard "One Dance" exactly once this week and it might be dead. Then again, "Worth It."

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