The Road to a Blockbuster: The Edge of Two Days from Yesterday

It's kind of insane that four years ago this month I offered a brief profile of Tom Cruise, and how he was universally awesome for like twenty years, then had a few moments where we all found out he was crazy as shit, but then he's had some kind of resurgence since then. At least in terms of public opinion. Since Knight & Day (2010), which inspired that post, Cruise, despite turning 52 next month, has settled neatly into an action role with three solid it not completely life changing films: Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol (2011), Jack Reacher (2012), and Oblivion (2013). All three have also been pretty decent, if not paradigm-shifting Box Office Successes. And we'll forget about Rock of Ages (2012), holy shit.

So here's some more Tom Cruise sci-fi business. He really doesn't do sci-fi that often, it's just that Minority Report (2002) and War of the Worlds (2005) are some of his most notable and successful films, critically and commercially, respectively. For Minority Report's part, many would also consider it Steve Spielberg's last great science fiction actioner, which is significant. Tom Cruise himself is often called one of the last great movie stars, and with just about every other great standard of the 90s, from Will Smith to Adam Sandler failing abjectly at the Box Office, that may still be true, for a real bomb eludes Thomas Mapother IV.

It helps that he generally makes good movies. I mean, generally good. And he's game for everything. That's a pretty rare trait for an actor. No matter how stupid or corny the role may be, Tom Cruise is all in, whether it be the sophomore directorial effort from the dude who made Tron: Legacy (2010) who is more concerned with apocalyptic landscapes than his A-List megastar or the latest entry in a spy franchise that has felt tired and uninspired for like ten years, but continually surprises and engages. There's a lot of hate on Tommy Cruise but it's just because of an exaggerated public persona that has surpassed the appreciation for his efforts on screen. Amy Nicholson in a recent piece in LA Weekly summed up his career decisions exhaustively, especially in terms of the kinds of roles he would or would not pick, which up until his recent cave-in to all-actioner mode, was often fascinating.

That's just it, though, Tom Cruise is an endless enigma. He built this epic reckless dude persona through Risky Business (1983) and Top Gun (1986), riffed on it through Rain Man (1988) and Born on the Fourth of July (1989), then back to a few action flicks before nabbing the lead role in Kubrick's last film and his best role, another riff in Magnolia (1999). His 21st-Century work is far crazier, though, with less clear distinctions between a need to balance mainstream Blockbuster fare and more personal work. Would Cruise appear in Vanilla Sky (2001) today? It's as if he's felt a need to sell-out, even though everyone has seen him as a sell-out for years, but that's not really true. It's just that any project the biggest star in the world does gains this tremendous profile, even his riskier, intimate portrayals of broken versions of the cocksure handsome jock-type he's earned millions of dollars on.

So, Edge of Tomorrow (2014). Director, Doug Liman has a knack for doing kind of everything, from indie creds (Swingers [1996] and Go [1999]) to the film that reshaped Matt Damon's career and produced a massive franchise (The Bourne Identity [2002]) to the film that created Brangelina, Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005). Seriously, his films have launched or significantly impacted the careers of Vince Vaughn, Jon Favreau, Matt Damon, Angelina Jolie, and Brad Pitt. That's no small order. Also, Jumper (2008). Jumper happened. By all accounts, these are also four exceptional movies, and despite his on-set wackiness, it's very clear that he had a distinct vision and his stars were on board, even if Emily Blunt was a little less patient than Tom Cruise, though not by much.

What's to say about this thing? It's Groundhog Day (1993) meets Omaha Beach with fucking aliens, it's a trip, man! What is really helping Edge of Tomorrow is its growing reputation for actually being a good film, which is exciting! You don't see those that often! The marketing blitz has been heavy, which is selling this thing as equal parts serious-minded action flick with a sardonic tone, you know, considering how many times Tom Cruise has to die.

It definitely seems like a familiar plot, although time loops can lead to some interesting story possibilities, like Triangle (2009). Still, this is generally new territory for this genre, and Tom Cruise playing basically an incompetent boob that gets killed a lot should have its share of supporters, haters or not. I'm curious if this really takes off because there's not a whole ton of other June action competition, at least till Transformers: Age of OMG DINOSAURZ!!!! (2014). I'm kind of betting though, that this dues about as well as those first three movies listed way up there. Decent, but not earth-shattering. My guess is that's what this thing's cultural influence will be, too. Maybe more significant than Oblivion, but that's not saying much.

Edge of Tomorrow opens everywhere...today!

The Road to a Blockbuster: Transcendence Shoots for the Brains

Today marks the release of Wally Pfister's Transcendence (2014), which when I first heard about it seemed to be positioned as this big landmark moment in sci-fi, something great, interesting, and cerebral to set the genre forward in an age where moviegoers seem more inclined to chase big flashy adventure pieces. From an examination of the marketing material, hype, and advanced reviews, though, none of this seems likely.

"Johny! Transcend me!"

Transcendence is funny. It's trying so desperately to be taken seriously, but by now everything cool it's trying to do with its cast and identity is a huge joke. It's boasting a big time get in Johnny Depp, who for sure remains one of the last true A-Listers, but a close look at his recent filmography reveals him more as a Supporting Actor All-Star in these big studio films.

It's a sort of curious phenomenon. When he's leading smaller flicks like, jeez pick one, Ed Wood (1994), Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998), Chocolat (2000), Finding Neverland (2004), or even The Rum Diary (2011), he's outstanding. His supporting turns in big crazy blockbusters where he puts on these really outlandish characters also range from the innovative (Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl [2003]) to the tired (Alice in Wonderland [2010], On Stranger Tides [2011]) to the underrated but probably racist (The Lone Ranger [2013]). While most of these made enough ridiculous money to see him as a pretty bankable star, when you add in The Tourist (2010) and Dark Shadows (2012), suddenly Depp as a leading man in big blockbusters seems like a bad idea.

His schtick just isn't as fresh as it used to be. Jack Sparrow was an incredible creation. Since then he's relied more on make-up and funny voices than any real heart. That's not to say he hasn't made good films - I'd still consider Rango (2011) one of the best animated films of the past ten years, but we didn't see his face on screen. So, how does that affect Transcendence?

It's not like Depp is going white-face for this. He seems to be more or less a normal dude, who I guess eventually becomes a brilliant technological singularity. Reminds me of Lucy (2014), which hasn't actually come out yet. But they apparently share the same Morgan Freeman, who more or less has settled into a "explains things with an incredible voice" role as much as Liam Neeson has settled into a "kick anyone's ass anywhere" role as of late. Everything about this cast seems so done to death, which is a shame, because the premise really isn't.

That's not to say that people will find the premise interesting. The concept of a human-computer singularity is actually fairly fascinating and prescient in today's culture of technological dependence. It's inherently erudite and not really the typical big summer smash 'em up material. I suppose that's why it's getting an April release.

Because of that April release I can't help think back to the similar vehicle from last year, Oblivion (2013), which featured heady material, a genuine A-Lister, a fledgling director, and a fairly shitty story. Advance reviews of Transcendence pits it at touching on interesting themes but completely falling apart in its narrative, which is really frustrating. Films that attempt really esoteric subject matter should be technically good films - why leave all the genius on screen instead of behind it?

I knew I had seen this premise before...

Oblivion brings me to another good point: it seems that every movie like this trying to be cool boils its core concepts down to one neat-sounding word. This dates back to Inception (2010). We get Oblivion, Divergent (2014), Transcendence, and then Nolan comes back round again with Interstellar (2014). For as much as Chris Nolan is a genius filmmaker, his influence on others, notably his boy Wally, who has been his longtime cinematographer before stepping up to the mantle directing Transcendence, has been a bore. Other directors under his wing like Zack Snyder seem to only understand the superficial trappings of his big budget work, which is just the arbitrarily dark tortured egos of male protagonists, usually over some deceased woman in his fridge. There tends to inspire an overwhelming sense of maudlin and more derogatory, an undue self-importance to the films of his imitators that just makes for shitty cinema.

Transcendence is trying to do all of this, and as a result becomes more a facsimile of a film rather than an interesting or original piece of art. This is Oblivion all over again, with an MIT veneer in place of Tom Cruise's Yankees cap. Because of this fact, it ought to fail to connect with audiences - the people don't mind derivative works, but they need to buy into the flashy ideas at work. Just look at The Avengers (2012), an incredibly derivative film masked by shiny explosions and Galaga jokes. Billion dollars. Transcendence isn't there.

So, see what you will today - Summer already started with Captain America: The Winter Soldier (after whining about both ends of the superhero spectrum - the flash of Whedon and the dreariness of Nolan, yes, Cap 2 is the kind of blockbuster I like), and it ought to remain that way until someone else swings along to fight electricity.

The Way We Were: The Flicks of 2013

If you're on the Internet this time of year looking at movie sites, no doubt you've come across one or two "Best Of" lists. I struggle with this concept each year, because it's tough to define what really makes a great movie. Is the best movie of the year the one that made me reflect the most about myself? Was it the most fun I had at the theater? Or is it the film that accomplishes the greatest technical achievements?

My general rationale regarding what makes a movie great is its cultural staying power - which is impossible to measure in a year anyway. Even though back in the day There Will Be Blood (2007) probably got the most cultural cache, and No Country for Old Men (2007) got all the awards, who knew that in December 2013 we'd be talking the most about The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007)? Does this make it the best of the three aforementioned slow moving westerns released in 2007? No, but there's never any telling with these things. It's all subjective and bonkers.

For these reasons, I've split up my favourite films of the year into three big divisions, because I'm going to the movies to get different things out of each. First we have the Blockbusters, where I'm looking at who did and did not succeed at the big spectacle (and sometimes I enjoyed the "failures" much more than the "successes"), who surprised me, and what I thought was genuinely interesting. Let's begin, counting down from no particular set number:

Blockbuster Division:

#5: Oblivion

Oblivion would have been a much better film if it had come out like thirty years ago so that it could innovate and inspire every sci-fi movie to follow instead of appearing to rip them all off. Still, even though it's a far cry from Tom Cruise's high sci-fi watermark in Minority Report (2002), it was a surprising film full of gorgeous landscapes, a likable Cruise, and even if most of the plot elements were largely lifted from dozens of other films, it was competently executed.

#4: The Lone Ranger

I loved the fact that Disney based their entire non-Marvel summer around The Lone Ranger, but Verblinski and Depp were more in a mood to make an anti-Blockbuster, pulling the rug out of its audience's feet with completely boffo shifts in tone, some of the greatest train sequences of the year (or ever), and a general disregard for big movie conventions, despite its identity as such. Racist and un-American? You got it.

#3: Iron Man 3

It took me a while to realize what Iron Man 3 did for superhero films. I'd be curious if it has as general an effect on the genre as something like The Dark Knight (2008) did. While The Dark Knight pushed everything to be "dark" and heady, Iron Man 3 asks why superhero movies can't be exactly like early 90s action movies. It both takes the suit off the Iron Man and the piss out of the Mandarin. While the fanboy in me was outraged at first, I eventually grew to appreciate Shane Black's postmodern take on the pomp and pointlessness of antiquated archrivals and their unnecessary place in the hero narrative. The result is far more interesting than Iron Man 2 (2010).

#2: Pacific Rim

Originality may be a stretch here, for Pacific Rim does borrow liberally from mecha, kaiju, and many anime genres, but still, this was the biggest, best original sci-fi of the year. It gets big points for the best world-building of the decade, its refreshingly multi-cultural cast, its relenting coolness, and Charlie Day. No other big studio film had as much fun with itself or gave its audience so much to play with this Summer.

#1: Furious 6

How did this Happen? Not only does the plot of Furious 6 run pretty tight, despite a complete disregard for physics (who cares), it changes the narrative of every movie that comes before it, which is impressive in a franchise largely written off seven years ago. From the Rock to Diesel's incredible headbutt, tank chases and runways that stretch from London to Manchester, Furious 6 announced itself as able to play with the big boys in a big way. When every other movie this summer tried so hard to be cool, this rose above the rest and lived it, baby.

Next we have what I'm calling the Prestige Division. These are the kind of high-minded films I'm betting we'll see on many end-of-year lists, but I've probably thrown in a few wacky choices. I'd consider these to mostly be thought-provoking dramas, but a single genre definition essentially eludes the collection I have here:

Prestige Division:

#8: The Way Way Back

This movie tends to come along every couple years. Sometimes it's called Superbad (2007), sometimes it's Adventureland (2009), but it always tends to be tough to get sick of. The Way Way Back takes itself slightly more serious than either of these two, and thanks to Sam Rockwell sliding into a perfect role (he tends to have a lot of those), and Carell caring less and less about stardom, this one works.

#7: Side Effects

I can't stop being a Soderbergh junkie, and this, supposedly his final theatrical film, brings everything you could want from the man. The narrative juggles and switches protagonists like no film since No Country for Old Men (2007), and continually threads a mystery between who to believe and who is full of shit. It's tense fun with a slight critique of Big Pharma for being huge dicks. Rooney, Jude, Channing, and Catherine are all must watches.

#6: American Hustle

Hustle, even amidst criticisms of being "Scorsese Lite," is a damned fine bit of filmmaking. David O. Russell essentially combines the casts of The Fighter (2010) and Silver Linings Playbook (2012) in a slick ABSCAM piece that has tremendous fun with itself. Is it a comedy? That's a question that rages across a lot of flicks this year, and Hustle, while probably not as groundbreaking as Silver Linings, is just as enjoyable.

#5: 12 Years A Slave

Steve McQueen finally brings instant acclaim to his filmmaking abilities with a brutal look at slavery in its nadir in the 1840s. It's not only a portrayal designed to shock audiences into recognition and remembrance of slavery's horrors, but a critical examination of black identity, the survival of hope among hoplessness, and the corrupting influence of the peculiar institution. Spoiler alert: this one gets all the awards come March.

#4: Inside Llewyn Davis

Somehow Llewyn stands out among Coen Bros films, which grows more difficult with each subsequent film they release. Biting bitter comedy flicks in and out with splashes of irreplaceable wit in an otherwise exceedingly sad film. "Please Mr. Kennedy" should be the song of the year and with John Goodman's presence turning The Artist (2011) and Argo (2012) into Best Picture winners, can he go three for three? 

#3: Wolf of Wall Street

If Goodfellas (1990) had never existed, I may have listed this higher. Any breakthroughs this may make in narrative Scorsese already accomplished with his seminal gangster flick. Still, Wolf is crazy good, with the kinds of overflow of sex and drugs we've always dreamed of seeing on screen. At its heart, though, it's a tortured an uncomfortably funny tale of a man who can't do anything but make money, at the expense of everyone around him, including himself. There's not a better fable to tell in an age where the financial sector regularly screws over the entire world.

#2: Gravity

Picking between these last two was very difficult. They both get a lot of points for using their medium really well. Gravity provides a reason to go to the theater again during a time when the entire industry is whining that they're losing out to Netflix and home viewing options. It's a nauseating, dizzying turn through space with a ridiculous performance out of Sandy Bullock that genuinely works best when paying for a premium 3D IMAX ticket. Finally, a film that makes the trip worthwhile. As soon as other studios learn this, everyone can get a slice of that Gravity pie.

#1: Spring Breakers

Even though it's an incredibly important film for the medium, Gravity really didn't have the story to push it to the #1 spot. I'll give that to Harmony Korine's gritty dirty Spring Breakers, which feels like a dream when watching it. It's bathed in neon excess, Britney Spears rhythms, guns, cash, and a lot of delusional dreams, both broken and half-fulfilled. James Franco's "Spring breeeeaaakk" breathy whisper echoes throughout the slow scene construction over and over again, and unpredictable craziness flows at every turn, not only because it was primarily filmed with real spring breakers interacting with four hot Disney starlets. It crawls and oozes like only it can and remains the trippiest flick of the year.

Finally, we have a smattering of movies that don't really belong anywhere. I doubt you'd find these on any "Best Of" lists, but a handful were the most fun I've had at the cinema in years. In favor of continually eschewing any regard for form or convention, here are the downright funnest flicks of the year:

Fun Division:

#6: Warm Bodies

I'm basically at the point where I'll reward a movie for just not sucking. That's Warm Bodies, which takes what could have been a pretty stupid Twilight-esque premise and eschews any sort of expectation that could come along with that. The Zombie genre has been deconstructed time and time again by now, but perhaps never better than in this romantic comedy. The hokey ending be damned, this was a nice surprise.

#5: Don Jon

Otherwise known as Jersey Shore: The Movie, Don Jon showcases Joseph Gordon-Levitt as a competent and confident filmmaker, pushes a love of porn and girls in some new exciting directions (seriously), and offers a smooth ride from beginning to end. I'm still not sure what it is about this trashy sub-culture that attracts so much adoration from the general public looking it, maybe it's just how ridiculous yet commonplace their generally accepted behavior is within their own communities. I dunno. I can't stop watching, though.

#4: This is The End

I would put this at the top of my list for the whole year, but I understand there's a pretty heavy caveat - just about all enjoyment of this film depends on whether or not the viewer is pretty familiar with the culturally accepted social personas of the actors involved, as well as whether or not the viewer enjoyed Pineapple Express (2008). I'm a big supporter of both, so I had more fun watching this flick than any other single movie this year. Since it's so dependent on buying into that quasi-fictional world though, it's ultimately held back from being a truly great comedy. I also really didn't buy that Backstreet Boys reunion.

#3: You're Next

Probably the greatest marketing for any movie all time, You're Next proved to be the best kind of horror film - small, scary, fun, and effortlessly iconic. There were a lot of pretty good horror flicks this year, notably The Conjuring and even Insidious: Chapter 2, but James Wan can't get all the credit for reviving the genre. This little renegade movie needs a whole lot more attention than it's been given so far.

#2: Pain & Gain

Auteur Michael Bay's greatest film, and notably one of the most insane experiences at the cinema this year, Pain & Gain presents a non-stop assault on the senses, but not in that normal explosion-driven Bay way. Is the American Dream completely delusional? What's the price for success in a world that restricts the working class and rewards the liars and cheats? What's the best road to the top - honesty, steroids, theft, murder, or cooking hands on the grill? These are the big questions that I'm not sure Bay is even sure he's asking, but Pain & Gain contemplates them all pretty thoughtfully while serving up constant insane nonsense. It's a spectacle.

#1: The World's End

What's more to say? The fourth of four end-of-the-world comedies to premiere this year, and the second on this list, The World's End caps the Cornetto Trilogy and doesn't disappoint at all, in fact there's a good argument to be made it's the best of the three. Without a lot of fluff or other goofiness in the kind of film that could easily slip up, this flick provides laughs, some of Simon Pegg's strongest character work, and an answer to the hundreds of man-child alcoholic films that began with Will Ferrell and have accelerated through Todd Phillips' Hangover series. Every inch of this movie is covered in brilliance and it's thoughtfully the best outright comedy of a year full of pretty great ones.

Actor of the Year:

This was a pretty tough call this year. Tom Hanks had a few high profile roles in Captain Phillips and Saving Mr. Banks, but despite his admirable best efforts, both those flicks were kind of shitty. 2013 will always be remembered as the year everyone started treating Matthew McConaughey with more respect between Mud, Dallas Buyers Club, and The Wolf of Wall Street, but none of those flicks were really mainstream. Therefore I'm kind of torn between James Franco and Dwayne The Rock Lobster.

Now, The Rock starred in one of the biggest films of the year, Furious 6 as well as Pain & Gain, G.I. Joe: Retaliation, and Snitch. The thing is, though, only the first two of these films were really that notable, and neither especially because of Dwayne. Franco had a little bit of everything this year - big blockbuster potential with Oz the Great and Powerful, indie cred with Spring Breakers, a comedy blast with This is The End, and a bizarre domestic drama, Homefront. Not only that, but he appeared in small films such as The Iceman, Third Person, and Lovelace, and directed three additional festival films. He was also roasted on Comedy Central. Now, Franco may have the same lack of widespread cultural influence that the Rock did, but for sheer volume and diversity he gets our Actor of the Year award, with Dwayne a close second.

Actress of the Year:

This was also a very tough decision. Jennifer Lawrence just like last year has awards buzz from American Hustle, won the Academy Award for Silver Linings Playbook, and starred in one of the biggest films of the year, Hunger Games: Catching Fire. I'm also looking at Amy Adams, who had a slice of big budget blockbuster with Man of Steel, and two smaller great films in Her and American Hustle.

This duel, however, is coming down to the two starts of The Heat, Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy. Besides the success of The Heat, Bullock owned Gravity, and McCarthy added a supporting role in The Hangover Part III and provided a lot of the success of the year's first hit, Identity Thief. I'm not going to question the cultural impact of Gravity, however, and Bullock will get our Actress of the Year Award.

Scenes of the Year:

#11: When Oz's head finally makes its appearance in Oz the Great and Powerful, there's a lot of clever pay off there that encapsulates the entire movie and this douchebag's journey from Kansas to Oz.
#10: Pick any train scene from The Lone Ranger or The Wolverine. Why were trains in this year?
#9: Much of Star Trek Into Darkness fell flat, but Kirk and Harrison's (c'mon if you don't know who he really is by now) space jump saw Abrams briefly find a moment to equal the thrill and excitement of Star Trek (2009)
#8: There's not much more to say about the powerful hanging scene from 12 Years a Slave - McQueen lingers uncomfortably long on Northrup's body - if you don't get the point after the first thirty seconds, maybe another thirty will do.
#7: There were two big SPOILER-y superhero scenes that changed a lot in the genre this year - the first upends everything Superman is supposed to be about when Man of Steel kills Zod. The second is when Tony Stark finds out about Trevor Slattery and everyone's idea of what makes a supervillain is completely upended.
#6: Michael Cera has always seemed like kind of an enigma, but his brief turn in This is The End blows by ridiculous into a super-insane coke-fueled, Rihanna ass-slapping glory.
#5: Did you hear the apocalypse was cancelled? The best moment in Pacific Rim may be both of Gipsy Danger's Kaiju exterminations in Hong Kong (a double tap and a sudden massive sword, respectively), but when Idris Elba tells us that they're cancelling the apocalypse - damn if we don't buy his conviction.
#4: Gravity lets you know what kind of innovative, unique movie it's going to be from that first, exhaustive opening scene scrolling through the infinity of space.
#4: Smaug Awakes in The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug - it's as if this whole crummy cash grab was worth it - Smaug is an incredible character and Peter Jackson offers us a rare pay off that's really worth it.
#3: Say what you may about Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues, and many will point to the absurd obligatory battle scene, but for me, nothing beats the moment where the family says goodbye to Doby.
#2: It's hard to pick a scene from Spring Breakers. The most famous scene is surely James Franco serenading his masked beauties to the tune of Britney Spears' "Everytime," but I dig the crazy tension and character turn when the ladies make him fellate his own gun.
#1: You knew this was coming. Leo, on Quaaludes goes into the cerebral palsy phase in The Wolf of Wall Street. It's horrifying, hilarious and full of powerful character moments all at once. Scene of the year.

Trailers of the Year:

I always like dishing on trailers as their own special artform. Let's begin with films that came out this year:

Gravity - This first teaser still scares the shit out of me. In just 90 seconds the trailer demonstrates the inescapable fear, loneliness, and terror of the whole film, as well as a brief showcase of the crazy good effects. Seeing just this in 3D IMAX for the first time was more memorable than the Man of Steel that followed it.
Don Jon - Trailers have the unenviable task of capturing the spirit of a film, grabbing our attention without spoiling big moments, and getting our butts in seats. Don Jon provided a memorable trailer based on a simple man's routine that's interrupted by a unique woman that shows a lot of story but leaves the viewer intrigued for more. And the music's perfect.
Hunger Games: Catching Fire - I give this a lot of props because I didn't see The Hunger Games (2012), and have no desire to see Catching Fire, but this trailer really made me want to check it out. It's mostly the intriguingly conniving dialogue between Don Sutherland and Philip Seymour here that catches my fancy, hinting at some brains behind this bippity YA adaptation. You have my attention - thanks, trailer.
The Wolf of Wall Street - Even if the film itself is really just Goodfellas meets Boiler Room (2000), the trailer presents itself as wildly original. It's got a fine slice of insane douchebaggery on display, exhibits Leo's totally unhinged performance, and presents the film's irreverent tone set to the intense thumping of Kanye's "Black Skinhead" - a match between clips and song made in heaven to perfect demonstrate the theme of this flick. MORE IS NEVER ENOUGH couldn't be a better thesis for this flick. Completely engaging and instantly re-watchable, it's a nigh perfect trailer.

There is aother set of trailers that came out in 2013 for films premiering in 2014. Let's wrap up the year in movies by dishing on them:

The LEGO Movie - I can't think of a worse idea for a movie than LEGOs. I mean, I love LEGOs, but the point is to play and build with them, not watch them on a screen. This trailer gets a lot of credit then, for just being damned funny ("The 2002 NBA All-Star Team...") and hinting that maybe, just maybe this won't suck.
Captain America: The Winter Solider - Could probably go without seeing the Helicarrier go down, but as far as cookie cutter Marvel superhero flicks go, this seems solid. More than Thor 2 (2013), this looks to push Cap's ideals as far as they go, especially through S.H.I.E.L.D., which seems like a nice little dose of Civil War. I'm intrigued more than I should be.
Godzilla - This is another movie that really needs to prove in its marketing material that it won't suck. The trailer succees with a kind of urgency that is usually lacking in previous campy Godzilla films, GINO (1998) included. It wisely sticks with just shots of shadows, and destruction, mostly around one scene, which aptly demonstrates just what kind of film this wants to be - a badass realistic interpretation of the Big Tokyo Stomper. Walter White can't hurt.
X-Men: Days of Future Past - How the hell were they going to pull this one off? While holding back a lot of his hand, Bryan Singer helps us remember how he started all this superhero nonsense - with damned good character work. This trailer doesn't need a big explosion at its climax to let us know it's a big shouty important movie - merely one man saying to his younger self, "We need you to hope again." It understands where its drama is and promises a hell of a ride by way of character, not set pieces. If that holds, that'll be about the best we can hope for.

The Road to a Blockbuster: Pot Smugglers, Ocean Monsters, Planes, and Matt Damon's Robot Arms

Here is a special Wednesday Edition of the Road to a Blockbuster. There are no less than four very disparate films dropping this week, and two today. They're all in crazily different genres and none are very likely to succeed financially. This column is not only focused on the films' commercial success, though, but also any potential for critical praise or more importantly, cultural cachet. Let's start with the Wednesday films:

At least it has that chick with the cute eyes from that Imagine Dragons video

First up is Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters (2013), which is a sequel to Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (2010) that I did not realize was being made. Based on a popular series of young adult novels, the first film was a reasonable hit for a February release, although I'm not sure it deserved a Summer Sequel. Still, this is August, where plenty of crazy random movies are typically dropped and sometimes succeed (District 9 [2009]) and sometimes plummet (Scott Pilgrim vs. The World [2010]). So what kind of potential does Sea of Monsters have?

Although it's an established property that likely has a good number of fans who are eagerly anticipating the release, but the marketing campaign has barely registered with anyone outside its demographic. While the first one was competent enough of a tween-pleasing modern mythological romp, no one else really gave a shit about it. There's also a shitload of these books. Like eight of them, apparently. These tend to be to Twilight what the The Chronicles of Narnia to The Lord of the Rings - a much less successful adaptation that will fizzle out far before its time with very little cultural significance. Or perhaps we can see it as the children's version of Clash of the Titans (2010). Either way, this franchise is garbage.

Next we have We're the Millers (2013), a nice raunchy late summer R-Rated comedy. This is often a good launching point for these kinds of flicks, from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) all the way through The Campaign (2012). We're the Millers features an exceptional cast, from supporting Ed Helms, Nick Offerman, and Katherine Hahn to the core of Jason Sudeikis and Jennifer Aniston. Aniston in particular seems to be finding a better niche playing against type than she ever did in forgettable roles that could have been played by anyone, like Bruce Almighty (2003) up through The Bountry Hunter (2010). Between this and Horrible Bosses (2011), though, she's really been playing the R-rated older sexcat pretty damn well.

Not bad for 44 years old...

If anything, We're the Millers ought to be remembered as that movie with the Aniston striptease scene, not unlike how a film like Your Highness (2011) is known for showcasing Natalie Portman's butt. It's a great achievement. As for Sudeikis, is there any other SNL alumn who is more desperate for leading man stardom? He's had a string of low to high profile flicks poised to be his breakout flick, his Happy Gilmore (1994), or his Anchorman if you will, but none have really caught on to become classics. Sudeikis just isn't terribly funny. He's more bland and snide than really likeable and relatable, even if A Good Old Fashioned Orgy remains underseen and underrated.

I'm not sure We're the Millers will break out and become the next huge comedy movie or even become a beloved cult classic, but it's got a decent premise, a measurable spin on the family vacation movie, and the kind of sardonic attitude it needs to become decent Netflix material. Speaking of films that are better at home viewing, let's move on to Disney's Planes (2013).

Planes is a spin-off of Pixar's Cars (2006), that was not created by Pixar, but rather Disney, originally for a direct-to-DVD release that suddenly got a nice theatrical release in one of the more crowded summers for Animation in recent memory. Hell, it's even been a croweded July for kids at the cinema. From EPIC (2013) to Monsters University (2013), Despciable Me 2 (2013), Turbo (2013), and The Smurfs 2 (2013), it's been a little overwhelming. And Cars was soulless enough without the blatant cashgrab Cars 2 (2011), much less the needless spinoff, Planes. I mean, the Cars franchise basically did the unthinkable, lowering Pixar's brand and reputation as a vaunted movie studio that effortlessly churned out hit after hit, critically and commercially. Planes is just further skewering their goodwill, although to be fair, all that is actually doing is bringing them down to everyone else's level.

There's no way Planes succeeds this weekend. Parents are already sick of dragging their stupid brat kids to every dumb movie this summer, and assuredly won't dish out more dough for a version of Cars in the air. There is also very little chance it catches on culturally in any way. If anything it will merely add to the hated legacy of Cars than build anything on its own. That's why Cars is so criticised. It's symbolic of Pixar finally failing and making subpar movie with the intention only to sell toys. Planes is a reflection of that and as a result, is ultimately hollow.

Is Matt Damon turning into Bruce Willis?

Finally, we've got the big hitter this weekend - Elysium. All this took was a cool name and a proven director - Neill Blomkamp and I was in. Of course, Blomkamp really only has District 9 to his name, which more built off what he had previously created. Who knows if he can actually make a decent big original sci fi film, but at this point, originality should be praised. This summer actually had a handful of original sci fi flicks, from Oblivion (2013) to After Earth (2013) to Pacific Rim (2013). It may be argued that Rim serves more as an homage, Oblivion as a pastiche, and  After Earth as a heaping pile of shit, but at the least, none were sequels. None of these films have exactly lit up the box office, either, which doesn't portend well for a future that is full of sequels and remakes ad nauseum.

There is hope with Elysium, though, right? There's no telling how the film will actually be or whether or not we'll by Matt Damon in his bald glory, but out of every film dropping this summer, this is about the only one that could really make the kind of cultural impact we've been looking for. This is the movie that will inspire the hipsters of 2035 - the ones who will wear ironic Matt Damon T-shirts and reminisce how they don't make movies like Elysium anymore. Those may be some steep expectations, but it's what we need in these dark times. Help us, Matt Damon, you're our only hope.

Which of these four insane movies will be you watching on Netflix 6 months from now?

The Road to a Blockbuster: Now You See Will Smith

The sun rises on another Summer Friday, so naturally, we have some movies clamouring to be the next big cultural iconic moment. Here at NMW we take the opportunity to dig into these potential blockbusters, to examine not only their potential for critical and commercial success, but what kind of impact they may have on our culture. So far this summer has lacked any standout features, not only because each week has given us a huge movie - from Iron Man 3 (2013) to Furious 6 (2013), so it's been sort of hard to concentrate on any one property for very long. There's also not a great amount of heterogeneity so far. Luckily, though, this weekend offers us two original features.

And James Dave Franco!

That's a good thing, right?

Let's start with the Magician Action Heist Caper (you read that right), Now You See Me (2013). This movie seems to have a crazy cast that includes Isla "Rebel" Fisher, Morgan "God" Freeman, Melanie "Shoshanna" Laurent, Mark "Hulked Out" Ruffalo, and even a mini-Zombieland (2009) reunion with Jesse Eisenberg and Woody Harrelson. Still, remember that first bit you read. The Magician Action Heist Caper. This comes at a time when the magicians most recently on anyone's mind are Gob Bluth and Tony Wonder (Isla Fisher's presence doesn't do us any favors to help forget that fact). Arrested Development made Gob a modern magician for a reason - it's inherently very campy and goofy (although they demand to be taken seriously). In the same way, it's a little hard to take this pretty doofy looknig movie seriously.

It actually doesn't really help that director Louis Leterrier seems to be readily seeking to defend it, along with other turds he's made. Yes, there's an excuse for everything, Lou. This ultimately feels like it should be a March or April release instead of a big Summer flick. It hasn't gotten a ton of support, although the cast is well-liked and it seems flashy with just enough of a bit of mystery that it may do pretty decently. Are we going to drop everything to catch it on F/X in 2016? No. It ought to make decent background fodder, but there's no reason to invest anything in this movie. And that is because magicians are stupid.

Against this stiff competition we have the real deal - After Earth (2013). Is it actually an indoctrination into scientology? Was filming it so rough that Jaden Smith wanted to be emancipated from his pop as a result? Does Willow whip her hair all over the end credits? Will Smith is one of the few remaining movie stars that is still pretty reliable, although it's not all that clear how much he's even in this damn movie. The basic synopsis is that him and his son crash land on Earth in the future after it was abandoned and he's injured while his son goes and fights Diego from Ice Age (2002). It also seems like Will is sucked out of the ship during that trailer - so...is Will even really in this thing? I feel another backlash of expectations when this becomes the Jaden Show real fast.

I wouldn't mind if Hancock was in this

Anyway, this could serve as a vehicle to propel Jaden into his own level of superstardom. And maybe he made enough fans off of The Karate Kid (2010) to hold down an audience. Still, this is a Shyamalan movie...sure it's an original Will Smith idea, but this is a director who has been burning down his goodwill and auteur status for over a decade. Apparently he's just a journeyman now, about as good as a Brett Ratner or Rob Cohen. That makes be a little sad. I mean, the cat had talent. Who knows what happened to him, but now he's apparently churning out tailor-made shit like After Earth instead of his own work. Maybe no one is letting him write his own stuff anymore. That's probably a good idea.

Still, it's a bit intriguing that the two biggest stars left on the planet have both made original movies within a few months of each other that features themselves as the only humans left on the planet. Kind of. Tom Cruise's Oblivion (2013) was a fairly surprisingly competent movie, if not fairly derivative of you know, everything from Independence Day (1996) to Spaceballs (1987). It also at least had its visuals to fall back on, along with a pretty cool twisty story, and a hell of a dedication on the part of Tom. After Earth has none of these. Can it really break out this summer? At this point it seems like Summer 2013 is really falling between Furious 6 and Man of Steel (2013), and it's really tempting to take a break this weekend (or catch Furious 6 after sorrowfully seeing The Hangover: Part III [2013] last weekend...). I don't see any film from this weekend really going anywhere. And whenever I'm about to change my mind I see those awful CGI Baboons. I mean, Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011) did more with less, M., you can't throw up that shit anymore.

Will you see some magic this weekend? Or at least a big deserted earth filled with the Smith family? Or do you prefer to stay in the Matrix?

First Impressions: Oblivion

Last week I predicted that Oblivion (2013) would be a sort of OK film, but would not have the kind of cultural impact where kids wear "Tech 49" ironically on T-Shirts twenty years from now. After viewing the movie and letting it digest for a few days, I won't retract that statement, but I came close. And that should be an indicator of how good Oblivion really is.

Let's get a few things clear off the bat. "Good" is fairly relative. Here there be SPOILERS to follow - let's make this a discussion of the film rather than a review - It's an incredibly derivative movie, at times borrowing elements from Moon (2009), Independence Day (1996), 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), Terminator: Rise of the Machines (2003), Total Recall (1990), Wall-E (2008), The Matrix (1999), and Spaceballs (1987). However, even though it mashes together this bizarre conglomeration of elements it does spin a few tropes around, contain some genuine surprises, and in general does a nice job with what it rips off while looking gorgeous doing it. Perhaps it would be best to recount the plot via the rip-offs.

That perfect "oh shit!" moment

Ironic enough, the film's most original aspects come from its initial controlling idea. Think Wall-E starring Tom Cruise with a bit more sex and less garbage. Cruise and his partner are effectively the last people on earth cleaning up the nuclear mess made by the humans themselves in a desperate attempt to counter a hostile alien invasion. Some of the nasty buggers are still running around causing problems for drones and big cleaning machines.

There's a lot of well-placed mystery here, which raises many questions which actually end with a lot of payoff (something Prometheus [2012] could learn from...). Tom is the inquisitive type, driven by dreams of former Bond Girl Olga Kurylenko and a soft spot for books, the great outdoors, and Led Zeppelin (there's been a ton of Zep on film lately - I'm wondering if they made director Joseph Kosinski go back and re-edit where the needle drops on the record player like they did for Argo [2012]). Eventually curiosity gets the better of him, and he's captured by aliens while investigating a crashed orbiting ship full of humans and (WTF) Olga herself. Ooh doggy!

Here's where the Total Recall (1990) parts come in - Tom obviously has met Olga in a past life, but he's had his memory wiped prior to starting his current 5-year mission. It also becomes apparent via some handy Morgan Freeman-driven exposition, that Tom was once a pretty bad dude but now, thanks to an exotic woman, he's back on the side of the good guys.

From here the flick goes really really crazy. When fighting off drones and forced into what is labeled a "radioactive zone" Tom Cruise finds himself face to face with none other than...Tom Cruise. They fight, but in the end, the Tom Cruise with the Yankees Cap beats the Tom Cruise wearing an Ascot. Of course he does. From there the Moon vibes start really settling in. It almost seems really apparent that Kosinski checked out Duncan Jones' underrated 2009 film and then scarfed on the really cool twist at the end. Because Oblivion is slightly obtuse in describing the actual events, I'll recount them here:

In 2017, Planet Earth was visited by a weird floating object called the Tet. We sent our best astronaut (Tom Cruise) and his team, including his wife (Olga Kurylenko), and co-pilot (Andrea Riseborough) to check them out, but they got stuck in a tractor beam. Feeling a sense of dread, Tom ejected the pod with his wife and crew in status, which orbited around earth for like 60 years. Then, the Tet (otherwise known as HAL. Not even really inspired by, just straight up HAL from 2001) cloned a huge Tom Cruise army that attacked the world and then built lots of drones to keep humanity subjugated while the Tet made these huge machines to suck up our oceans ("You're gonna be in trouble cuz they gonna steal your air!").

Let that penultimate fact set in for a bit. Yes, aliens came and cloned a Tom Cruise army. Not for nothing, that shit would be damn formidable. And charming. Moving on-

After humanity had its ass kicked, the Tet kept a few of the Toms around for basic upkeep while the drones demolished everything else. I suppose they studied the little guy, and understanding that humans worked better when they think they're fighting for humanity (Oh! The Matrix!), concocted this little scheme where they used a reproduced image of NASA's flight director (Melissa Leo) and a wacky story about nuclear war and a colony of remaining humans on Saturn's moon, Titan, to keep all the Tom Cruises in check. One of the more clever means of doing this was restricting each Tom to certain areas surrounded by "radioactive zones," which in fact, contained other Tom Cruises doing the exact same thing. Whether or not they all of their own little baseball cap or ascot I don't know.

What a gorgeous wasteland. You got a quarter?

So by the end all the machines go nuts and turn on Tom in his own house (and they look exactly like this dude in Terminator: Rise of the Machines), and he escapes to the secret lair of Morgan Freeman, where they've been storing all of humanity's art and crap. What's cool is that this actually elucidates some of the other inconsistent questions in the film. It's really unbelievable throughout that Tom and his rag-tag gang could  have fended off the "Scavengers," as they call the Aliens, with 2017 technology, and then suddenly be capable of setting up a colony on Titan, within you know...a few months, as well as huge planet-cleaning machinery, and incredibly advanced drone and weapon technology, especially after a world-devastating war. As it turns out, yes, this is all unbelievable because that's all alien (although to be precise, there are actually no aliens in this film, just a single intelligent computer and its Tom Cruise Army), and the humans living underground are exactly as crappy and scrappy as they should be, using 2017-level assault rifles and Morse code to get their shit done. That's the kind of fighting and living that would have made a film like Terminator: Salvation (2009) more believable - instead of prancing around in tents where everyone can see, humans must wear radar-reflecting armor at all times and burrow underground lest they be blown to hell.

So lastly, we have an ending very similar to Independence Day. Actually, it is exactly like Independence Day. Tom Cruise flies a nuclear weapon up to the big mothership by exploiting the intergalactic being's trust, and is then able to detonate it, which causes all of the other drones to immediately malfunction. There is some cool ribs on that formula, though, such as opening up a pod that was supposed to contain Olga Kurylenko and instead seeing a gleeful Morgan Freeman face pop out, letting Tom Cruise scream "FUCK YOU!" to a giant computer and then ka-blamo!

By the end, in similar vein to The Dark Knight Rises, the film ends up having its cake and eating it too. Tom Cruise Clone 49 blows himself up in a heroic self-sacrifice. Yet he still gets the girl in the form of another clone, Tom Cruise 52, who finds his blushing bride hanging out in the woods three years later. It may be kind of hokey but it's a satisfying way to end things. Besides, there must be at least 50 other Tom Cruise Clones running around somewhere who could be very confused after they just saw Melissa Leo explode. There's plenty of room for a sequel to rip of Wrath of Khan (1982) or The 6th Day (2000) or whatever.

So all in all, the film looks great, and is actually fairly interesting, if not really built and re-mixed from many other sci-fi films. The soundtrack is also pretty great, even though it seems as if M83 totally ripped off Daft Punk's score from Kosinski's other mediocre blockbuster, Tron: Legacy (2010). It really did just feel like the Tron soundtrack was playing throughout this whole thing, which while not necessarily original, did fit the film. All in all, it's decent, though somehow not original enough to earn that T-shirt acclaim, which is also bizarre, considering it's one of the only big-budgeted non-sequels we're gonna get. At least until Pacific Rim (2013) and Elysium (2013).

Happy summer!

What did you think of Oblivion?

The Road to a Blockbuster: Tom takes our spirits to oblivion

It was a long fell winter, folks, but we're here to revive that Grand Old Norwegian Morning Wood Tradition of The Road to a Blockbuster - our weekly examination of the commercial, cultural, and critical potential of those big Summer Tentpole films - you know the ones, the only movies that people actually care about. We left last Summer with some terrible films like The Possession (2012), Premium Rush (2012), and Hit & Run (2012). Since then, Jewish Monsters are all the rage, Michael Shannon has been looking dumbly menacing in Man of Steel (2013) picks and Bradly Cooper overtook Daniel Day-Lewis for an MTV Movie Award. What a wild time it's been.

Go Blue Jays

Now, you may be thinking, "Dammit, it's not Summer yet! It's not even the last weekend in April!" That is true, and traditionally we will take that first Summer Blockbuster Weekend in May with a big dumb superhero movie as our Summer kick-off (this year we get Iron Man 3 [2013] to fit that bill). April, however, has been creeping on May's heady action for some time now. Today we see the release of Oblivion (2013), which is a big Sci-Fi flick starring Tom Cruise that only really got dicked on the release due to its original story. A terrible original story for sure, but it just doesn't really have anything to build from.

A big part of this column is a desire to predict cultural reverberations. What movies will we get to see as Burger King toys and 7-11 Cups? I always wanted a playset to reenact scenes from The Master (2012), but that dream is dead. More importantly, which films will we gather around to discuss a year from now, sit down on a hungover Sunday afternoon two and a half years from now, make fun of for being awful ten years from now, and then ironically put on a T-shirt twenty years from now? That is the true lifecycle of a movie, my friends. So, how does Oblivion stack up?

So far, Oblivion has been walking that fine line between "kind of cool" and "retarded." It's true that it's Tom Cruise returning to Sci-Fi after some success in action films like Jack Reacher (2012) and Mission: Impossible V - Ghost Protocol (2011) lately. Mr. Mapother IV gets a lot of criticism, but he really doesn't star in awful movies that often. For every Knight and Day (2010) there is a...well, an M:I:IV-GP. Sure the little dude's off his rocker, but he's been somehow pulling off legitimate action roles for nearly the past thirty years and remains one of the planet's biggest movie stars, despite what any of the haters say. AND in this movie he's wears a Yankees hat. That's pretty cool.

In your face it explodes!

Wrong. No one likes the Yankees. And no one really gives a crap what story Tom Cruise is in if it's not interesting. And, by all early accounts, Oblivion is boring as hell. Director Joseph Kosinski made one of the better looking and better scored films of 2010 in Tron: Legacy, which did kinda-sorta OK at the Box Office, and at least laid the groundwork for some nice coherent world-building for a cool TV Show. Tron: Legacy should have been a great movie. It built on the previous film enough while simultaneously engaging earlier fans without stranding new ones. The chief problem was that no one really gave a shit about Tron (1982) and somehow the film never connected with audiences despite looking straight-up awesome. That's really only because the story was convoluted garbage half-based on a film no one saw thirty years ago (and few are chomping at the bit to put ironically on a T-shirt), and the other half-based on Jeff Bridge's character from The Men Who Stare at Goats (2009) trapped in the worst parts of The Matrix: Reloaded (2003). If that reference makes no sense to you, or you can't fathom that cultural juxtaposition, then Tron: Legacy probably didn't work for you. You're in the majority.

So what does any of this have to do with Tommy's post-apocalyptic Oblivion coming out today? Evidently the picture's damn near gorgeous, but if you can piece together a storyline from all of the trailers and commercials, that's about as good as you're going to get. The flick will probably do nicely at the Box Office, although it's a busy time of year, and with the recent tragedy in Boston, people may not feel like going out and watching a movie about the end of the world. It'll get swept under the rug as the better marketed Pain & Gain (2013) comes out next week and then all hell breaks loose when Iron Man 3 drops the week after to officially kick off the Summer Season.

As Morgan Freeman says, "Cigars are cool and I don't give a shit if they wouldn't last 60 years underground."

What's Oblivion's T-Shirt status? Thank goodness there's already a plot summary on Wikipedia so I can make references to "Tech 49." I don't see it as being that cool or catching on, primarily because the title "Oblivion" is pretty damn vague, and searching for it only gives me images and articles about The Elder Scrolls IV (2006) anyway.